Every now and then we get a little angry, if something doesn't go our way of if another person ticks us off then it's understandable that we want to lash out because of our frustration. This is a perfectly natural human emotion. What happens though when we find it difficult to deal with our anger, what happens if we get more angry than usual? We all know someone who probably gets a little more than they possibly should when concerning certain things. It may be the case that they have an anger problem. While anger is a perfectly normal human emotion, if you don't deal with it in the right way, if you are unable to contain and control those feelings of anger, you could find yourself lashing out at those closest to you.
People with anger problems aren't able to deal with other emotions that could potentially damage their reputation or image. It's easier for this person to feel anger rather than shame or sadness. It could be that anger is the 'go to' emotion for any sort or negative influence on that person's life; so rather than deal with an emotion such as shame, that person decides that instead that he or she will simply get angry and lash out. In this example, anger is used as a defense mechanism to shield that person for feeling any pain and showing weakness.
These feelings of anger are not uncommon, in fact a recent study shows that almost a third of us know a close family member or friend who has problems dealing with anger. This can have a serious effect on our relationships with these people, you could find yourself working harder to keep these people happy in case they lash out or become angry again. The threat of physical or verbal abuse from these people is often great, and if you find yourself trapped in a relationship with a particularly angry person then it can be very difficult to get out of or talk to that other person about their anger issues.
The unfortunate thing about anger is that while it is a perfectly natural emotion, it can start a vicious cycle of anger. If a person who has trouble dealing with anger and over reacts at something small and lashes out, they can find themselves getting even angrier than before because they have lashed out in the first place. It can be hard to calm down and deal with these issues once this cycle is up and running, the person can find themselves in a whole heap of trouble as they forget what they got angry about in the first place and in turn become even angrier.
It seems that with people who suffer from anger issues, that anger is always the 'go to' emotion for any type of negative influence on their lives. When a problem or issue arises in their lives they don't stop or think about how they are going to deal with it, they just rummage around in the emotion drawer and pull out the first thing that comes to hand, anger. Once you've become used to dealing with everyday problems with anger then it can be difficult to stop. Anger is like a drug, when we're feeling angry it releases adrenaline into the bloodstream to get us pumped up. The body is forced to work harder and blood pressure is increased. We get a release from acting out in anger and working off this adrenaline, it is this release that people can become dangerously addicted to.
Not only is this psychologically damaging but it can also be detrimental to our health. Those that suffer from anger problems have been shown to have increased blood pressure and weaker hearts due to the organ having to deal with increased blood flow when that person gets angry. This can seriously decrease the life expectancy of that person.
Dealing with anger is never easy, but it is a necessity. If we fail to deal with our anger in the proper way then it can have serious effects on not only our relationships with other people, but also have a massive psychological and physiological effect on ourselves. There are now a number of different ways in which we can learn to deal with our anger such as anger management courses and group therapy where you can learn to deal with your anger in a number of different ways. Rather than reaching for anger at any opportunity you will learn how to control yourself and relax, it's about taking that second to think about what you're really doing and realising that anger isn't your only option, that you can deal with your emotions in a normal and rational manner.
There are ways of dealing with your anger, it's important to speak to the professionals and get help from anger management courses and psychologists.
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