Rabu, 13 Februari 2013

Nothing Ever Happens to You - Things Happen Because of You

You are all involved in influencing the outcomes you see in your world, whether you believe you are or not. From the moment you wake up every day you are influencing or at least trying to influence the people around you, to conform to meet your needs and expectations. You use many different guiles, to influence people to do things the way you want them done. Whether it be a request from you to your spouse to make you a cup of coffee in the morning, whilst they are busy making one for themselves, or you making a cup of coffee for them, so that they will warm to you in the morning etc. You are continually involved in some form of influence or other throughout your day.

The more skilled you are at influencing people to support you to enjoy any outcome, which is favourable to you, the better the quality of life you will lead. Remember the way your life turns out five years from now, will not be as a result of the things that happened to you, but rather, they will be a result of the things that happened because of you. Commit 100 % to your future and believe in yourself and you can begin to mould any future you desire.

Positive Influence
Yes it is possible to manipulate the people around you, so that you always get your way. The challenge with this is that it is never sustainable in the long term. You cannot manipulate people in a one-sided fashion, where there is no fair exchange and expect the relationship to be sustainable. On the other hand, when you are always focused on encouraging a positive outcome with the people around you, as you attempt to influence any situation, where you are always looking for ways to be of service and you always ensure there is a level of fair exchange. You will over time build trust with people and any relationship will be sustainable.

Success is a Result of What you do for people, not to them
The level of success you will enjoy in your life or business is directly proportional to your commitment towards helping people get what they want. For example if you are in sales, prospecting becomes simple and building trust and connection with your prospects is a cinch, when you are authentically committed to helping people solve challenges or satisfy needs. When you are in a modality of always looking for ways to be of service to people, they will feel your genuineness and commitment and see your desire to always provide them with the best solution. Rather than feeling pressurised to engage with you in a single one sided transaction, they will want to build a long term mutually beneficial relationship with you.

As Zig Zigler so aptly said, "You can have everything in life you want if you will just help enough other people get what they want". Your commitment to always be of service and to ensure that there is always a level of fair exchange between you and the people around you will ensure that you develop an understanding of their needs and will allow you to ensure that your product or service is exactly what they need.

Listen Twice as Much as you Speak
If you truly want to be of service to the people around you or to your customers, it is crucial that you master the art of listening. If you are busy thinking about what you are going to say next, instead of truly listening, when the people around you or your customers are speaking, you will miss the most crucial part of what they are trying to tell you. This means that you will be unable to connect with them or understand their real needs. You need to really listen to what people are saying, because it is not always their words that will reveal their need, it is often understanding their perceptions or interpreting hidden meanings, which will reveal their true needs and desires.

You can never interpret the deeper meaning, within any conversation, if you are self-centred and thinking about what you are going to say next. If you want to become someone who can positively influence situations, where they are mutually beneficial to both parties, then you must slow down, focus and pay sincere attention, when other people are speaking. Once you master the art of listening, you will have mastered the art of positive influence.

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