Being a Better Man, Staying Faithful and True

Being a Better Man will not be possible without following the second commandment:

Thou shall not commit Adultery.

Marriage is something wonderful and beautiful. It should be honored by everyone, not only your own marriage, but your neighbors' marriage as well. Adultery, philandering, or cheating as it is more commonly referred to, is something we've become all too familiar with. Whether we are the victims of it, the perpetrators of it, or know of someone who has been affected by its debilitating poison, adultery is unfortunately common in our lives. Our consciences clearly tell us that this is wrong; however most people who have committed it usually find some way to rationalize their actions. Even others who may have not actually committed this act, may rationalize the actions of others, and may think that in some circumstances it's okay. With so many sympathizing and rationalizing in respect to adultery one thing is still crystal clear. God and our consciences do not lie. Nothing good ever comes out of adultery. It represents the breaking of a covenant, which is stronger than a promise. It represents an inability to keep one's word, and an extreme form of selfishness that puts its own needs and desires above all others. The wounds from it are far reaching, affecting many people who had nothing to do with the act. It's like a powerful earthquake that affects many outlying areas several hundred miles from the epicenter. The aftershocks are too numerous to count. The destruction is too wide to access. It's a no brainer why God hates it and wants us to steer clear of it.

A real man is true to his wife and his word. He is able to control his thoughts, actions, and reactions. We were created much higher than the animals. We are not dogs or cats. We were not created to go around chasing after everything in heat. We are uniquely created moral beings, with the ability to contemplate ourselves, contemplate our actions, and know right from wrong. This ability is unique to man.

Adultery is a self-inflicted wound that results in the destruction of marriage purity, along with pain and suffering to those you promised to love and protect above all others. Though many may try to justify it, when all the evidence has been gathered, it usually only makes a case for extreme selfishness.

These types of actions will not bring the blessing of God on your lives. It will do the opposite.

I am aware that adultery is usually not on a man's mind when he gets married. It's common knowledge that many marriages end in divorce, but why is it that so many more marriages suffer from adultery? Well, I think we must understand that adultery is actually not just a physical act. Jesus gives us its full scope in Matthew 5:27-28 "You have heard that it was said, 'You shall not commit adultery. But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart." It obvious Jesus is telling us that if we look lustfully, we have already committed adultery in our own hearts. To put it plainly, when we look with sexual desire. I know that in society, many men have bought into the lie that it's OK to look but not touch. Often saying a phrase like, "it's OK to look at the menu as long as I don't order." Jesus is clearly telling us that it's not OK to look with sexual desire. Like many things when it comes to our conscience we first violate it in our mind. Once it is conceived in the mind, the body usually follows.

How to do we stop from committing adultery even in our minds? I believe one very powerful way is to stop looking at women as sexual objects to be conquered. A woman is a wonderful unique creation, hand fashioned by God himself, which he breathed the breath of life into. Seeing women as God's unique creation will help keep you from degrading them into something they are not. Also realizing that when you commit adultery with someone, not only are you taking yourself out of the blessing of God, your also leading this other person down the same dark path.

How serious is Jesus about adultery? Let's look at a few more verses here starting with Matthew 5:28-30 "If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell."

That is to be our attitude not only in respect to adultery, but toward all sin. Now I know that a lot of us would be walking around without any eyes, no legs, and no hands if we took this verse literally. But I believe that Jesus is telling us that we need to do all that we can to protect our marriages, our purity, and our families from the curse of adultery. This is what real men do. We keep our covenant, keep our purity, and keep our consciences clear. God doesn't ask us, and for that matter, our wives and families are not asking us to do anything we are not capable of doing.

Please, let us be real men. Not acting like a floating log of driftwood that is moved by every strange impulse or desire, but more like an ocean liner, whose engines are full steam ahead, and whose course is set on the high seas of purity, integrity, and true love.